Things here have been really, what’s the word, worrisome.  Natalie had a minor complication from surgery that hopefully is working itself out.  She went back to school this week and is loving the attention.  They are so glad to have her back and she is glad to be back.  Being home was getting boring for her. 

I wanted to share a little of what I have been recently going through.  I find it annoying how the evil one uses good things to change our path so that we are not in God’s will.  He has schemes that he continues to use, they haven’t changed over the centuries.  I have been involved in bible studies since Natalie was 6 months old.  She will be 11 next month.  I LOVE bible study.   I love learning and digging into God’s word, sharing life with other women, sharing what Jesus has done in my life and the hope I have in Him.  Well, recently I believed the lie that I was not supposed to be involved in women’s ministry.  I built an idol , I don’t want to go into what it was, but the sad part is it’s a good thing.  I became addicted if you will and really thought that I needed to pursue that road and possibly a career.  Funny thing is that I never consulted God about this new endeavor.  Went a distance down that road in my own strength.  At that time in life I found myself very unsatisfied.  I was aggravated, annoyed, tired, stressed and my my heart just hurt.  Thank goodness I have wonderful friends that speak TRUTH to me and pray for me. 

Natalie had been in extreme pain for quite a while and we couldn’t figure it out.  I was emotionally exhausted and physically drained.  I started focusing on the idol.   I did some research into this new “adventure” and it looked like what I was looking for to fill the void in my mind and heart, but you know that feeling you get, the one that tells you something doesn’t feel right.  Always go with that one.  I started having second thoughts, processed it over and over.  Then, then, the freedom came.  We went to church one Saturday night, I sat in the pew, exhausted, we had 5 or so minutes before service started.  The lights were low, music playing, people hustling around greeting one another, fellowshipping but it felt like it was all slow motion.  I looked down and opened my heart.  I told God how I was exhausted and I needed Him to come.  Fill my soul with Him.  I needed Him desperately.  Suddenly I felt peace, I felt as if someone had taken their hands from around my neck, I could breathe.  I was an empty cup and the hand of Jesus was pouring His living water into me.  The fogged cleared and I realized this was IT…this, church, ministry, is where I get filled.  It became very clear to me that the road I had been looking at (the idol) was a dangerous road, a detour.  I was detoured by lies!  Oh, but sweet Jesus was there, to redirect traffic.  He showed me the right way for my life.  That night in church, freedom.  Freedom from the lies. 

Now, don’t get me wrong.  People have jobs.  I am just telling you my story.  Yes, I have had to pull away from serving in women’s ministry for this season because my family needs me,  but, I will be back, I am confident in that.  Not sure in what area, but I know Jesus knows and that’s all I need to know.  Just need to continue to pray that I follow his road to get to my destination.  We need awesome, godly people in the workforces to share the hope in Jesus, to witness, to be shinning lights for Christ.  Do your job and do it well with Jesus. 

You always have to search for truth and if things aren’t adding up than it’s a lie.  Satan wants to divide us from God.  He will use “good” things as a detour.  Watch out for those huge potholes!   I look forward to serving again but know where I am needed right now.  God has a plan and will for me and for you.  Search to know him. 

I heard this song and immediately thought of my precious girls.  This is what I want them to know in the deepest part of their being!  Claim this truth..

Hi, its SMT time.  I am really enjoying memorizing scripture.  Okay, so I have only done one but it is very empowering.  I love having God’s word alive in my heart giving me a firm foundation.  Here is my SMT verse for the 15th of the month:

Psalm 105:4  Look to the Lord and his strength, seek his face always  NIV

This verse speaks to me right now because my oldest daughter just had surgery and has another one in a month.  It’s tough when one of you kids go through something like this.  On top of having special needs, she has to endure surgeries.  She is such a strong , brave girl and  I am confident that God blankets  her with safety, comfort and healing.  I want to always look to the Lord for my strength.  This isn’t easy.  I try to do things on my own and it never works out.  I get in the way!   God wants us to rely on him so that we look more like Christ.  I want to seek God’s face in all circumstances so that I am confident and empowered with  truth.   

I have some awesome, loving, caring and fun friends.  They are bringing meals to our family while Natalie recovers and look at this one brought to us today.   Can I just say that it was gooey, yummy and I want the recipe

Cheesy Chicken Enchiladas

Natalie and I came home from the hospital early this morning, we had been up all night,  so I laid down to take a nap.  While I was asleep another dear friend called saying she had a sweet treat to deliver, boy did she deliver!!  Look at these beauties

Gourmet Cupcakes

We can’t wait to dig into them.  What a nice surprise to wake too.  I tell you, we have such a fantastic circle of friends.  I am amazed at the love they so willingly, unselfishly give.  Recently we started a Life Group in our home and we are  growing to become terrific friends.  We are doing exactly what God’s word instructs, studying  His word, holding each other accountable, praying for one another and doing life together.  Such a great time of fellowship and growth.  I am also so thankful for all my girlfriends.  They are godly women, seeking Christ and desiring to know Him more.  We encourage, pray and just have fun in life.  Don’t know what I would do without them.  They bless me each and every day. 

I hope you have decided to jump into the SMT.  If so what is your verse for the 15th?  Remember to choose one that speaks to you for where you are in life right now.  It will impact you more and be easier to memorize.

I have lately been pondering on how to simplify my life.  Okay, you can stop laughing now.  Seriously, we live in a fast forward world and we wonder why we are fatigued, ill, depressed and aggravated.  Have you ever intended on doing something, something good and ended up so stinking annoyed tired and stressed that you sat shaking you head wondering what was wrong with you?  I have done that too  many times to count.

Mid-summer I felt a strong conviction to simplify my life.  I ventured over to our Family Christian bookstore and bought this study.

Becoming a Woman of Simplicity

This is an incredible study.  It has given me many things to ponder.  I would highly recommend it if you are looking to simplify your life.  One thing the author talks about is “good” vs. “best”  This has really intrigued me.  We all do many things that are good, but is it the best for where we are right now in life?  I started applying this to every opportunity that comes up in my life.  I have been asked to do several “good” things,  but I always say that I will get back with them on it.  I don’t want to impulsively commit and than be annoyed and frustrated.  I pray about how the “good” will impact my relationship with Christ, my family, my time and my sanity.  I used to be the yes girl, everyone would ask me to do things because they knew I would.  I used to be the people pleaser.  Well, learning through God’s word and applying some tools I learned in the above study, it has become much more easier to say “no.” I truly believe that God has broken me free of that captivity.  I also was a go, go, go girl and now I want to be home more.  I enjoy being home.  Now, I know that is totally out of my character so it is God!  Think about your weekly schedule.  How stressed out are you just thinking about it?  Especially with the holidays coming up, whew, anxiety rises.  There is hope! Jesus has a calling for each one of us.  I truly believe that when we live a surrendered, obedient life to Christ, our lives will be simpler.  Christ is faithful and wise.  Knowing Him and doing life with Him is the way.

Yesterday, my girlfriend and I were talking about living a simplified life .  We opened God’s word and this is a scripture we read ( we are in a Moms in Touch group, we pray for our kids and their schools)

Psalm 19:7-8

The law of the LORD is perfect,
refreshing the soul.
The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy,
making wise the simple.
The precepts of the LORD are right,
giving joy to the heart.
The commands of the LORD are radiant,
giving light to the eyes.

Do you see it?  The last sentence in verse 7, “making wise the simple.”  We thought that was so cool.  Not just the scriptures,  but we had just been talking about this very thing and then wham, God blesses us with this!  When you are wise, you are simple.  But, if you flip it “when you are simple, you are wise.”  Word play, I love it!  I also love that God’s law is perfect and refreshing to the soul.  Who needs some refreshing?  God’s laws also gives  joy to the heart.  Praise you Jesus!  God is trustworthy, thank you Father!

So I want to challenge you to look at your life, right now where you are and see where you can simplify.  Pray for God’ leading and for discernment.  Look at the “goods” and see if they are “bests”. What are your priorities?  It will be hard, trust me, but it is so rewarding and freeing.  This life places so many demands on us.  God doesn’t do this.  He just calls us to love Him with our whole heart, soul, mind and strength and then to love others.  That seems pretty simple huh?  We are the ones that fills life with busyness.  We don’t have to live like the rest of the world, rush rush, hurry, hurry.  We can be different!  Actually that is our calling.  To be different!

Good vs. Best!

My girlfriend Carol and I had the privilege to attend Living Proof Live with Beth Moore last weekend in Lexington.  To say we had fun is an understatement!!  We had a total blast.  First we got to get away for some girl time, second we got to stay in a nice hotel and we each got our own bed..with fluffy pillows and third, I prayed that God would speak to my heart and soul over the weekend.  I have been dealing with some internal struggles and let me just say that God delivered HUGE through Ms. Beth. 

The title of the event was “Jeremiah, author of Lamentations, Eat Pray, Love, One women’s search for everything across Egypt, Israel and exile.”

This was both of our first times to a Living Proof event, so we weren’t sure what to expect.  It blew my mind.  We had great seats, row F, from the floor up, which were not bad at all (it was open seating).  We were at eye level with whoever was on the stage. The worship that Travis Cottrell and the praise team did was incredible.   With voices shouting praises, hands raised in honor and hearts crying out to Jesus we belted it out.  In the moment, total connection.  There were 11,000 women from 29 states, that’s alot of women!  Here are two of them:

Beth M. brought a powerful teaching from Jeremiah.  She picked out scriptures that helped us remember Eat, Pray, Love.  She spoke alot about brokenness, desserts, idols and pretence.  God wants to meet us in our brokenness so that we can heal and be a witness for him.  God wants to come to the desserts in our lives and plow up the land.  A dessert is anyplace that we don’t allow God access.  Idols will cause us tons of trouble.  This statement was huge, ” we become what we follow, we will be like the idols we follow”  so what are you becoming?  God wants us to stop pretending.  How we worship, live, serve and love.  Stop pretending!   Be real, be free and be who Christ called you to be.   Big time stuff.  Deep pondering things.  It was what I needed for where I am right now.  Praise Jesus!  If you can ever get to a Living Proof Live event GO!  They are incredible and powerful.

Well, I am gonna leave you with some pictures.  Carol and I did have an awesome thing happen.  After the Friday evening session we sat in our seats allowing the crowd to clear out of the stadium.  While sitting there I glanced down at the stage and saw Travis Cottrell chatting with 10 or so women.  I told Carol to get her bags we were heading down there.  We got to meet him! Such a sweet guy who puts his whole heart into what he does.  He signed out program and we got a quick photo!  Isn’t that the coolest!!  What a way to end the summer for me.  Have a great weekend!

Hi, it’s been a while.  We have been in the process of a move.  Boy, that is alot and I mean alot of work.  We have moved before but not like this one.  Maybe because we are older and have a little one running around and Natalie’s sched. is hectic. Nope, it’s because we are older..hahaha.   The new house is such a blessing.  Caring for Natalie is much, much easier.  She has a roll in shower, there are no thresholds in any of the doors to bump he over, (those are the things at the bottom of the doors that you step over) the elevator has been awesome, she laughs when we get in and her therapy room will be terrific once we get what she wants and needs in it.  It is starting to feel like home.  We felt like we were on vacation the first week or so. 

The great thing is that now we can focus on our family.  Things are in the past, we are in our new accessible home and we can begin a whole new book.  The old book is finished, complete.  I love that feeling!  We can set new goals and dreams moving  forward!   It has been quite a journey with many mistakes and many, many blessings!  God has been faithful and mighty!  We have fond memories but there is just something about moving on. 

Speaking of being finished, the morning bible study that I go to is finishing up our study this week.  We have been on an incredible journey through “Experiencing God.”  If you have never done this study I would strongly encourage you to.  It is life changing.  You will learn how much God loves you and desires a relationship with you.  You will learn how to know when God is speaking to you, how to believe HIM and adjust your life to him so that you will experience all he has for you.  It’s all about not having a religion but a relationship!!  

I have to say that I am really sad.  I will miss my small group gals.  We  had some wonderful, deep conversations and have had tremendous growth in our group.  We have witnessed answered prayer and have seen the hands of God at work within us.  I will be eagerly be anticipating our reuniting in the fall!  This brings me to another topic.  What to study over the summer?  Summertime is always hard.  The kids are home, time is scarce and the days begin to run together.  All the activities keep you hopping.  But, that is one thing that I learned through Experiencing God, you have to stay in God’s word, staying connected and growing.  Just because it is summer doesn’t mean that we place God on the back burner.  We don’t put our time with Jesus on hold.  What if he did that to us?  What if he sent us an email telling us that he had some bigger fish to fry and he would be back with us in a month or so???  WHOA..that makes me think about how I treat my relationship with Christ.  What do I allow to become more important than HIM?  Sleep, t.v. shows, phone calls, housework, friends, kids activities, emails, facebook, twitter or searching the web.  This summer I want to make sure I am in the word, studying and growing.  So, if you have participated in a great summertime bible study, please share.  I would love some suggestions.  If you did, was it by yourself or did you do it as a group?  If it was with a group, how did you handle the kids?  Did you meet in the morning, afternoon, or the evening when dads are available?   Thanks in advance and I look forward to seeing what you all have done to stay connected to God!  Praying we all experience Jesus daily! 

P.S.  I hope to post some photo’s this week  from Easter and the new home!

Things are fun around our home.  We are getting ready for school, buying  supplies, orientations to attend, schedules to lay out.  Natalie will be in 4th grade and Phoebe is going to Kindergarten.  This will be such a huge change for us.  I have always had a preschooler at home.  Now my baby is going off to school. 

My motherhood season is changing.  I have been a preschool mom for a long time.  Now there are no  preschoolers in the Cross home.  We have entered a new season.  PUBLIC SCHOOL!!  I am excited, but nervous.  I have always had a schedule that consisted of:  getting Natalie ready for school, feeding Phoebe breakfast, getting in some exercise, shower, load Phoebe in the car and head out the door.  We either ran errands, went to preschool, play dates, bible study or attended MOPS.  My routine is changing.  I graduated from MOPS and now will be taking a kiddo to kindergarten. My mind still has a hard time with it. 

 It’s funny how you get comfortable in the season you are in and sometimes that comfort allows no room for growth.  I believe that the Lord wants us to grow continually.  I think he loves to see us enter into a new season.  He anticipates it.  Jesus loves to see us grow, especially in him.  This new season will allow me some much needed time and growth.  Though I am sad that my baby is going off to school and growing up, I am eager to see what God has planned for me.  I have spent alot of time in prayer for direction and guidance.  I know for myself I can get my plate of obligations cleared off and before I know it my plate is abundantly full again.  I have to be cautious and in prayer over the activities I choose to participate in.  I read in a book that sometimes we think we are the ones being called to aministry or organization when in reality Jesus just wants us to pray for the “called” person to step up.  That was huge to me.  I get all these ideas in my mind, believing that Christ is calling me to lead them or orchestrate when he is really just placing it on my heart to pray for it and them.  It is okay to just participate.  It’s okay to take days off and rest.  It’s okay to allow others to step up.  When we think we are the “called” ones and we aren’t, we are stealing the blessings of others and stressing ourselves out!

We do have a full fall season planned.  We are building a new home, which is very exciting.  I am attending a bible study at church.  Natalie will continue with physical therapy and Phoebe is going to start in American Heritage Girls.  I think that is enough for now, although I am praying about a Moms in Touch group.  If you attend or have attended a Moms in Touch group I would love to hear how it impacted your life and your children’s lives.  For those who are not familiar with Moms in Touch, it is an organization that get’s moms together once a week for an hour to pray for their children and their children’s school.   

For now, I am cherishing the last few days of summer break and cherishing my time with my family before we are back into the hustle and bustle of things.  How about you??

Well today is a bittersweet day for me.  It was my last MOPS meeting.  If you are not familiar with Mops, it stands for mothers of preschoolers.  It’s a wonderful ministry that nurtures and grows women in their motherhood adventure.

I have to say that when I walked into my first MOPS meeting in 1999, I had no idea I would still be going to meetings in 2009.  MOPS has meant so much to me.  I have met wonderful, amazing women.  I have developed friendships, served on the steering teams, and grown as a women, wife, mom and friend.  When life was extremely difficult, my MOPS buddies were always there to carry me.  When Natalie went through her tragedy, MOPS really stepped up. The women loved on me, they brought meals..to the hospital and then when we were sent home they came there too.  They sent cards and became strong prayer warriors. 

MOPS has allowed me to grow closer to Jesus.  It has helped me deepen my relationship with Christ.  I desired to be a godly women, wife, mother, friend, daughter and sister.  The women in the groups I have attended  allowed me to be me.  The good, bad, and ugly.  It has given me leadership skills that I didn’t know I posses.  It has been my outlet and my security when needed.  I am so proud to call myself a MOPS alumni. 

This chapter of my life is closing.  I have graduated from MOPS.  God has some other things planned and I want to be obedient in his destiny for my life.  I am sad, but also excited.  I know that I have built a foundation that Mops has helped pour.  Thank you MOPS for loving, encouraging, supporting, teaching, growing, serving and accepting me.  I will never forget all you have done!! 

Here is a link for MOPS International.  If you are not in MOPS and you have children, newborn to kindergarten I encourage you to check them out.  You will be blessed!

Spring has arrived!  I don’t know about you but I am glad to see the sunshine.  I am eager to be outside working in the yard, grilling, playing with my kids and getting fresh air.  I also enjoy seeing all the flowers that have been dormant for the winter season spring back to life and full of color.  If you think about it, we are like flowers.

(more…)

You train for marathons and races.  It is not easy.  You know what you have to do.  Be in shape.  Run with all you got.  Focus on the finish line.

(more…)